Today is not a normal day for me, as I was getting ready for the walk from home to Starbucks I got a pickup and delivery request, yes from Angel’s mom. Of course I am willing to get and bring the coffee back with me. It’s just not my usual way of doing things. Normally I’d just get the coffee for her because it’s who I am and because I don’t have issues with spoiling women in my life.

At least if they actually make it I can definitely deliver it. The reason I say she’s in my life is because I rent a room in her house. No there isn’t any funny stuff going on but I work with her husband so it’s more life stuff that’s just intertwined with how Angel set things up for me. Our dynamic may be somewhat over but we are most definitely involved in life as friends and from my perspective, it seems dynamic or not I will always be her sub in some shape.

Some of this is just the way things are going right now and I don’t know what may come next but I think if it’s just that as friends we continue and share parts of our lives together in the small things it might make life better for both of us.

I know that I can’t give her the travel life she enjoys but that’s ok in the poly way I won’t be the one who takes her around the world, and that I’m ok with. Whatever she needs is what I’m willing to offer. She knows that and accepts that. It’s better for her with the multiple partners and if I ever get to be considered for a partner spot I would gladly accept.

Yes I’m still looking for a partner, because I’m who I am. It would be nice to have someone to come home to and cuddle up with. I’m not holding my breath, and am find by myself, still doing what life has brought to me as my daily grind <snicker> as I sip my coffee.

One day at a time….